By Claire Lerner and Rebecca Parlakian
Put baby to sleep when he is awake.
Beginning at around 4 months of age, you can help your baby learn to fall asleep on his own by putting him to sleep when he is drowsy but not asleep. Learning to fall asleep on his own also helps him get himself back to sleep when he awakens in the middle of the night. When you rock your baby to sleep, rub his back, or feed him until he falls asleep, he may have trouble putting himself back to sleep when he wakens at night. He needs you to get him back to sleep. There’s no right or wrong way to put your baby to sleep. Your bedtime approach depends on your beliefs, values, and goals around sleep.
Plan for protests.
As your child learns to fall asleep on her own, she may cry or protest. This is very common,as it is a big change for her. So it’s important to have a plan for how to respond when she cries out for you, which naturally can be very distressing. For example, you might want to peek your head in every few minutes to assure her you are still there. Or you may decide not to go in at all after you put her down (unless, of course, you think something is wrong). Some parents choose this latter approach because going in and out can excite the baby and even upset her more. Think through these options, talk about them with your partner, and decide together how you want to respond. This can help you feel more prepared and better able to follow through on your plan.
Love the “lovey.”
For children over age 1,a lovey (e.g.a treasured stuffed animal or soft blanket) can be an important part of a child’s bedtime routine. Some parents choose to give their child a lovey that the child uses to comfort and soothe himself to sleep. The lovey can ease the separation that some children feel when their parents leave the room at night.
Turn off the TV.
Watching television together doesn’t often work well as a bedtime routine. The goal of the bedtime routine is to help children relax and get ready for bed. TV shows are often noisy and stimulating, which makes it difficult for children to wind down. Also, even though children are sitting near their parents while they watch television, it’s not the same as having one-on-one attention during a bedtime story.
